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In Memorium

Sep. 11th, 2009 | 11:23 am

8 years ago, my new life had just begun. That of a wife. Subsequently, of a mother.

8 years ago, however, with my new husband, I watched the lives of so many others ended, together with the lives of their loved ones they left behind, forever.

I hope those loved ones, who were left behind, have gone on to build new lives and achieve great things in the memory of those who left them.

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(no subject)

Aug. 18th, 2009 | 06:50 am

Ok Becky! Here goes!!

1. Your Middle Name:
Azlina

2. Age:
35

3. Single or Taken:
taken with chain and balls

4. Favourite Film:
whoa, um, The Thing

5. Favourite Song or Album:
Here Without You - 3 Doors Down

6. Favourite Band/Artist:
None really

7. Dirty or Clean:
depends on subject matter :P

8. Tattoos and/or Piercings:
I'd love a tattoo but no, none of the above

9. Do we know each other outside of LJ?
Unfortunately, no :(

10. What's your philosophy on life?
1) Assumptions will get you nowhere, 2) Never underestimate your enemies, it'll affect your judgement

11. Is the bottle half-full or half-empty?
literally or metaphorically speaking? o_O

12. Would you keep a secret from me if you thought it was in my best interest?
Honestly? Don't think so.

13. What is your favourite memory of us?
emails about Jared's project :)

14. What is your favourite guilty pleasure?
chocolate, or we'll be here forEVER!!!

15. Tell me one odd/interesting fact about you:
I actually have a decent enuff singing voice

16. You can have three wishes (for yourself, so forget all the 'world peace etc' malarky) - what are they?
1)my family's and friends' health stay intact
2)travel round the world
3)learn Italian

17. Can we get together and make a cake?
I'd love to!

18. Which country is your spiritual home?
Honestly dunno. Good question tho!

19. What is your big weakness?
1)My family

20. Do you think I'm a good person?
Hell yeah!!

21. What was your best/favourite subject at school?
Literature

22. Describe your accent:
Generic American but apparently, according to hubby, leaning towards Australian.

23. If you could change anything about me, would you?
Hell no!

24. What do you wear to sleep?
PJs

25. Trousers or skirts?
Trousers

26. Cigarettes or alcohol?
Alcohol

27. If I only had one day to live, what would we do together? (If you have no idea, just say something crazy, it'll entertain me!)
Track down SPN's filming locations, stalk em, try n see if we could meet dem boys, have a good meal with our families, top it off with the biggest fudge and brownie we can find!


There ya go! :)

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(no subject)

Jun. 26th, 2009 | 09:50 am

I used to watch Charlie's Angels with my nanna, believe it or not.

Nanna left when I was 14. To say I miss her every single day would be saying the least.

And now Farah Fawcett's gone. She was our fave Angel.

And now my first EVER crush in my life has decided to follow her.

Man, no words.

RIP y'all

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(no subject)

Apr. 27th, 2009 | 03:22 pm

Hmmm....no hugging.

I guess, in a way, it DOES slow the queue down. Even if it's for 0.27 seconds. BUT, having said that, Jared was an experience. And hugging him was, yeah, ANOTHER experience altogether. And I guess if you're die hard fans, it WOULD be a disappointment to NOT have any form of physical contact with an actor whom you SO admire, when you finally get to meet said actor.

My heart goes out to the Sunday con goers. Irregardless of why the rule was in placed, I'm sorry y'all were robbed of the experience of hugging your respective fave actor.

Many thanks to all the reports and pics and vids painstakingly put up by the awesome people out there!

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(no subject)

Apr. 16th, 2009 | 01:40 pm

Dear Jensen & Jared. Well, and Misha too, I spose. But mostly, Jared.

Dude, almost a year since I last saw you. AND made a total tool outta myself. Twas fun, tho. I met some awesome people, some not so awesome people and this guy who probly harbors a secret desire to be on the next instalment of Police Academy...anyway, yeah. I hope the chocolate and candy and whatever else I can't remember buying you now was good. And that you didn't eat em all at once! If you did, well, OINK OINK! Join the Piggy Club.

Been keeping up with the recent cons courtesy of the AWESOME people who were amazing enuff to share their experiences and pics and vids and squees...anyway, you were amazing. Well, you and Jensen. And the rest of the guests. Too bad Mr Beaver wasn't there. Dude ROCKS, nowadumsayin? 

Got the news y'all are coming. Last year, actually. Dude, I so wanna go it's pathetic. Dang, this is actually a sob letter to ya. The I-wanna-go-but-I-don't-have-the-goddamn-dough story. Yep, THAT one. See, previous ticket was cheap enuff for me, $150. Got me in and allowed me to make a fool outta myself in your presence. What more could a tool like me ask for!! :)

BUT, this time? If I wanted another hug from you and have you sign, I dunno, my stuffed pig AND not tryna talk and take a pic at the same time, my husband would've had to fork out $800.

Dude, that's like, half of my monthly mortgage bill. As much as I'm desperate to be there to see you again, and Jensen, can't forget Jensen, I love my husband more. And coz of that, I couldn't bring myself to make him squeeze that kinda moolah out of a stone.

So, enjoy your stay here, again! Hope they put y'all up in some fancy joint, mebbe y'all can go to the Royal Easter Show and do the rides. But be warned, tho, ya hafta pay for every freakin individual ride!! Ain't Disney, nowadumsayin?

Wish I could be there, but hey, I got my share of you, that 0.34 seconds we hugged. :) I'll be happy.

See ya on tv!

me

p.s. : Jensen? If it makes you feel any better, I would keep a foot bet us for the pic coz NO WAY would I get up close and personal with someone who's got more prettier eyelashes than moi!!! :)

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IMDB

Apr. 15th, 2009 | 08:37 am

Scares the shit outta me. Amazing how people fight over someone who'll NEVER be theirs, someone whom they'll NEVER know on a personal basis. People get shot down just for posting pictures of their fave stars' girlfriends. GEEZ...people also get shot down for having neutral opinions of said stars' girlfriends. I mean, bloody hell, I've never met her, won't ever get to meet her and she sure as hell don't give a fuck bout what I think and I DEFINITELY don't give a fuck bout what she thinks! But she didn't cross me the wrong way. She sure as hell didn't cross me the wrong way by being the girlfriend of someone I think is fucking fine. Sides, I've got a man who's already doing one helluva fucking job fucking my brains out!

She's lucky, but I'm just as lucky coz I think the sun shines outta MY man's ass. At the end of the day, we're disecting each other over some stranger. If she's a bitch to his fans, well, too bad for us. Sucks to be us then. But she makes him happy. That's all he sees and that's all he cares. Him and his family. Nobody gives a fuck whether or not she makes his fans happy. And nobody should. At the end of the day, that's all we are. Fans. One drops off, he'll find another, no biggie. Yes, he appreciates us, but not to the extent of wanting our opinions on who he should fuck and marry.

All that shit over someone we can't even call friend.

I'm done.

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(no subject)

Feb. 10th, 2009 | 07:55 am
mood: numb numb

Been telling my honeybunny I wanna travel somewhere, ANYWHERE!!! Last time we left the country was like, a yr and a half ago. To go visit the rents. Which, to me didn't count as a vacation *insert eyeroll here!!!*

Then, I wake up yesterday, turned on the tv and see fires and floods and practically WHOLE towns razed to the ground. 108 lives lost.

Today, the number's gone up to 173. And we're to expect said number to reach 200.

As selfish as it may sound, I'm grateful to God, I don't know anybody in Melb. But there're people who are dear to me up in Queensland. y'all know who you are! Keep safe, a'right?

I hate this coz it's man made. Some honest-to-goodness cunt lit up the fires.

I hate feeling this way coz while my feelings will go away and I'm being comforted by my blessed family and precious belongings, the victims will be living with these feelings for the rest of their lives.

I hate feeling so helpless despite knowing that every little bit of help DO count and DO help.

What do you say to these people? Houses can be rebuilt, but lives lost?

The cunt or cunts who started these calamities should be burnt ALIVE. And if I have my way, I'd bring em back to life just to burn them again. And again. For every life that's lost.

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Lil 5"4 ass

Jan. 28th, 2009 | 01:13 pm

I used to hate math. Like, hate it with a vengeance kinda thing. No problems whatsoever with the teacher. Nice guy and all. Then he left. And an older man was the replacement. Suddenly, boy do I LOVE math! I went from a -F, if there's such a grade, to a B. I remembered him telling me, I actually had it in me, just needed the key to open the door and let free the knowledge, the capability. And I realized then, that said key was him. My math teacher. Modest man. Simple man. Easygoing. Approachable. But he'll let the class have a taste of his iron fist when we got outta line.

That's who I've come to think of the late Mr Manners. The key. Sure, everyone of the directors who came and went were good in their own right. But from the relationship that's been spoken off time and again by the boys themselves and the rest of the cast AND crew, it's pretty obvious who's the best. The cast are good in their own right. But it takes a good eye, a DAMN good eye to notice the strengths of the individual casts and experience and a bucketload of natural ability to draw said strengths to the surface and allow the casts to create magic.

Anybody can plant a flower. But it takes a special pair of hands to make it blossom and bloom and flourish, full of life and love, apparent to the naked eye.

RIP man.

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Hope

Jan. 21st, 2009 | 07:33 pm
mood: hopeful hopeful

Congratulations and all the best to the citizens of the United States of America and here's hoping your country and the rest of the world will reap the rewards of your monumental decision!!

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(no subject)

Jan. 19th, 2009 | 09:59 am
mood: blank blank

USD2300 for a ticket to lunch with Jared.

I think I'll need the rest of the year to process that.

o_O

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10 Happiest Moments in 2008

Jan. 5th, 2009 | 06:38 am
location: Home
mood: content content

Very, VERY cheeky, babe!! You know who you are!! LOL :P

A'right...my happiest moments, let me show you them...

1. My son going to daycare...happy why? I stopped crying...NEVER thought I'd be the one with seperation issues....GEEZ...

2. Lost some weight

3. Highlighted my hair...sad, I know...never wanted to do it till now...still dunno what to think of it!!

4. Being a part of every milestone my son's achieved since his birth...think this is gonna be an every year thingy!

5. Gawd, meeting Jared Tristan Padalecki. OH GEEZ...don't let me get started!!

6. Making new friends...the ups of fandom? Amazingly AWESOME people...you know who you are!! :))

7. Coming outta my cave to actually leave comments on brilliant masterpieces brilliant people wrote.

8. Lost a wittle more weight.

9. Learnt how to swim...which will continue this year

10. Made it thru another year with the people I love.
Tags: ,

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(no subject)

Aug. 14th, 2008 | 09:24 pm

 I'm a Lamborghini Murcielago

http://www.tomorrowland.us/sportscar/images/lambo.jpg

You're not subtle, but you don't want to be.  Fast, loud, and dramatic, you want people to notice you, and then get out of the way.  In a world full of sheep, you're a raging bull

http://www.tomorrowland.us/sportscar">Which Sports Car Are You

Grazie, atsugari8!!

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Song

Aug. 11th, 2008 | 08:13 pm

Interesting how I alternate between Dixie Chicks' Cowboy Take Me Away and 3 Doors Down's Here Without You when my mind starts to wonder. All the way to Vancouver too.

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Jensen II

Jul. 25th, 2008 | 06:19 pm

*facepalm*

A'right. This self-confessed Jared girl is coming clean again. I can't remember when I wrote this one but it's after the one I wrote for his birthday. Here goes

Through the dredges of time
across the endless ocean
within the walls of my dream
you become mine
the heat of your touch
warmth seeps through my heart
anchor for my wandering soul
despite this distance apart
total intoxication
from a taste of you lips
I loose my mind
from the friction of our hips
you slip through my fingers
when the sun takes her place
in the sky
time and again
till my tears run dry
it is enough
it will have to be
as I wait for the moon
when you come back to me

jra

the demented depths of my mind, y'all

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Jensen

Jul. 25th, 2008 | 05:57 pm
mood: cold cold

So, I'mm hafta come clean. I actually wrote a poem for Jensen as well. On his birthday this past March. THEN.....I wrote another. *sigh* So. I guess this is my ode to Jensen then. Talk bout BELATED birthday wish!

A small innocent spark
it began that way
but it slowly became a raging fire
images of you torment me night and day

Like one of Michelangelo's
lost in time
smoldering hooded eyes
half bloom lips, like rich, sensuous wine

Stolen brushes and touches
like poison arrows through my senses
tearing me apart
breaking down my defenses

The silky caress of a whisper
molten desire courses down my spine
cannot meet you and not wish
for every burning moment
you would be mine

jra - 010308

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July 19th, 1982

Jul. 20th, 2008 | 09:14 am

So, twas Jared's birthday yesterday. Wasn't planning on doing anything at all. Ecept, mebbe think of him a little. LOL Yeah, ok, ALOT. But anyhoo, words started forming in my head around bedtime last nite and I wrote em down. I completed the rest this morning. First time, ever, I had to take up two days to write something, to me, very simple. I'd like to think it's not shallow! I have to have pain and emo and shit to write these and I had lots of em back in the dark ages of my life, i.e., teenage years LOL. Got married and couldn't write much since. Had to dig really deep to get in touch with my inner fangirl to come up with this.

 Anyway, Jared, well, what they all said yesterday. :)

Happy birthday baby
thought I'd write a note to tell you
nothing's been the same
since you held me in your arms
since your lips whispered my name

Happy birthday baby
still feel you next to me
in your arms, I felt so safe
you carried my heart out of a loveless cave

Happy birthday baby
oh how you filled my senses
I was drowning in you
you tore down my defenses

Happy birthday baby
a lifetime too little
the moments spent with you
priceless memories I'll keep
coz now that's all I can do

Happy birthday baby
well, here I am
and there you are
not much I can do
but want you from afar


jtp-200708

 

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JARED PADALECKI, SUPANOVA CONVENTION, SYDNEY 2008 Part I

Jun. 22nd, 2008 | 04:28 pm

A'right y'all, here goes. I've decided to write a mini thesis, if one can call it, about my experience at the convention. It's lacking in pictures simply coz I didn't bring my camera and had forgotten TOTALLY about the one in my cellphone. Sad, I know.

Ok.  Lets start a little before the day itself. When I heard he was coming, I was humming and harring on whether or not to go, but hubby (thanks hon, owe ya BIG time) told me if I didn't go, I'mma regret it fer the rest of mah life. So, went online and bought the ticket, to be collected on said day.  And on the forum that I usually go to, I found out some of the members were going as well so we hoped we were able to meet up. And I did. Two lovely sisters from Queensland. Mandy and Kristie.

Anyhoo, said day came and had to drag poor hubby and baby outta bed and we were out and away from home by 7.50am. Geez, the things I do for that boy!! lol

He dropped me off and there was already a queue, thankfully, not too long. Got there at bout 9.15am, I think and froze my fat ass off waiting in the cold, with my backpack and the bag of goodies I bought for Jared, hence, my response later on. Y'all will find out...lol...

During that time, till we were let into the joint, I had one helluva time watching the antics of the comic fans all dressed up in their fave characters. UNBELIEVABLE...some, I didn't know whether to laugh or cry...eg, Superman..geez...I think Tom Welling would be offended!! *cackles* 

Got my red wristband, coz I go the Supa Hero Pass, which entitled me to a photo op and an autograph and guaranteed seat during the Q & A session. But all I wanted was to say HI to Jay-red. 

Anyhoo, went in and went straight to the long table where the autograph session was to be held and queued up with Mandy and her sis for the tickets to get our entited autographs. I bought a ticket for a daughter's friend and we all stood in line. I almost didn't get the autograph ticket coz the lady at the till told me I had to give her my entry ticket stub. I was like, WTF. See, when we were let in, I went to the registration desk and when it was my turn, I showed the lady my wristband and the stamped copy of the internet purchase and she went "you're right doll, just go right in" And right in did I go. And like, after queuing for donkey minutes coz people before me were humming and harring over which photo to get him to sign, she was telling me I had to go back out?? I TOLD her what the lady outside told me and she changed tune and gave me my autograph tickets with a smile. I'm sure y'all can guess it ain't sincere!! lol

There were 4 different glossy prints of Jared. 2 alone and two with Jensen...and I was like, Jensen?? He's not freaking here!!! Like, rub it in, why doncha??!!!!!!! Idiots!!! I got the one I thought Jared looked hottest and paid for that. $40 well spent when Tabi, my friend's daughter squeeeed and gave me a jumping hug, both intermittently during my time at her place last nite!! lol

I actually missed gettin something so very impt during this time, which I only found out VERY close to the photo session and FREAKED out internally later on. I'll explain later. 

Anyhoo, we then lined up, and since we had the pass, we were pushed ahead. My hands were so cold, it was scary. Mandy was freaking out and I kept repeating in my head, Tabi with an I, so I won't screw up her autograph and that kept my sanity intact!! Thanks Tabi!! 

I didn't even know he was out till Mandy was like, "Oh my GOD, LOOK" and there he was. From where I stood, the first thing that came to mind was "Oh my GOD, there's SAM" LOL...After my brain cleared I finally "saw" Jared. He's one of those, in my opnion, who pretty much looks the same on and off camera. 

Anyway, I got Mandy to go first and kept on with my chant. When she walked away, I stood where I was till the lady next to him, who was dressed up as Ms Ditta Von Tease (spelling) beckoned me forward. I got up to the table and heard this exhuberant "HI!!!" 

What was my reply????

"Dude, I feel like a total tool lugging this around all morning in the friggin cold" and proceeded to plonk the goodie bag on the table. And it was only then that I looked at him. 
He gave me the patented Jared Padalecki laugh, threw his head back, laughed out loud and repeated what I said 
"oh my god, you feel like a tool"....

Next goof up, understand, I still didn't look at him in the eyes even up to that point. I was concentrating on the goodie bag. don't ask me why. LOL...where was I? Yes, goof up II. I pushed the bag towards him and said 
"Now, everything that's hard in there is yours"
I know, open mouth, swallow FEET. He went, "WHAT? WOW" He leaned forward to catch my eye and that's when I looked up and straight into his eyes and thought, "GOD, SO BEAUTIFUL" followed by, "WHAT THE F#$K did I just say??!!"
I got all flustered, went "NO, NO, NO, THAT's NOT what I meant!!" and he laughed. Again. 
So I told him bout the two little animal plushies I bought for his niece. He was smiling when I started explaining that just in case he didn't have enuff time to go shopping for her. I wasn't sure whether it was a boy or a girl so I decided to get a kangaroo and platypus plushies. Animals are neutral, so, safe zone. The smile became a serious, surprised look and that's when he gave me THAT Padalecki smile. GEEZ, I'm AMAZED I can remember what he said after seeing that smile. 

He said "Oh wow, thank you SO much! That is such a refreshing thought! Y'know, I got in late last nite and yeah, I dunno if I'm gonna have enuff time to do any shopping. And yes, Juliette Michelle will be very pleased. Thank you!"

Ms Von Tease took the bag away and we proceeded with the autographs. I had him do Tabi's first and then took my journal and told him my name. He signed it and I was on my way, telling him I'd see him later for the photo op.

Right. All thru lunch, me, Mandy and her sister had one helluva time giggling at the attendants who were dressed as their fave comic characters. I even got humped by R2D2, but that's another story. 

Anyway, we made ourselves pretty and went to queue up for the photo op. This is the impt bit which I had missed out earlier, the tickets for the photo op. See, despite having the wristbands denoting our level of priority and what we were entitled to, we still had to get tickets for the autographs and the photo op. The autographs I could understand coz you can get multiples at one go but the photo op, I don't. Anyway, when I saw Mandy holding hers, I realized I didn't have one and went back to the desk where THE lady at the till was and amazingly, she was VERY accomodating and gave me one right away. 

The minders told us we hafta be quick coz there're like 200 of us wanting a pic with him. And to be polite. WHAT THE EVERLOVING F#$K??? Be polite? Not like I was gonna grope the guy!!!! Tempted to, tho. The line went QUICKLY. It was amazing. Mandy's sister went first and then her and get this, even before she moved away from Jared, the security dude manning the site was like "Move it, move it" to me!!! Police Academy much??!!

Jared looked at me, I looked at him, we both smiled at each other and I started walking towards him. 
That's when he went "Hey Nor" and put his hand out towards me. 
And that's when I froze midstep. All I could think of was that he REMEMBERED me. Granted, it wasn't not too long ago(!!) and I was probly the only Asian early in the queue and with what I said with the "stuffs that's hard" being his, guess it wasn't THAT difficult!! 

There was a stool for those who wanted to be taller. He pulled me in, right up against him, pointed to the stool and asked me, before the photographer could, "ya wanna use the stool?" I looked at it, and went "No stool". Yeah, I know. I SO need a filter. He went "A'right, no stool" and we posed. I had decided earlier than altho they may have hurried us like MAD, I freakin paid for the pass and I'mma have my microsecond with him. So, in mid pose, I asked him if he was still accepting individual hugs. 

BAD move. Word of advise, DON'T talk when you're posin for a pic. Or you'll end up looking like me in the pic. 
He said "Hell yeah" and I got my hug. I was gonna let go when I said "OOO, Happy Birthday in advance too". I had loosened my arms but his tightened when he heard that. I heard him said "Aww, thank you" and I got a backrub.  Yes people, he's FIRM. 

That's it. Like I wrote in one of the forums, it's amazing the amount of memories one can make in such a short amount of time. I'm taking mine to my 6 x 6 slot in the ground, or before, if I end up getting a mind losing illness.
He was EVERYTHING and more. SO much more. I didn't know about the horrendous journey he had from Dallas to Sydney and what had happened to his luggage. He could've been distant and projected his fatigue, but like I said, he gave me enuff sunshine to last me thru my winter. 

He's the REAL deal. A guy who finds it amazing that people like him, like what he does and wanna meet him. I never expected him to be that happy that I had thought of his niece. And I never expected that happiness to be SINCERE. You know that when he says thank you, he means it from the bottom of that Texan heart.

Nothing I say, will say, will come close, EVER, to the man he truly is. 

He has the most sincere smile, next to my husband, but then I'm biased on that second half! And y'know how despite a hug, you sometimes still feel awkward and apart from that person despite being in his or her arms? 

In Jared's hug and arms? Felt like home.

So yeah. That's it. Ask away. I feel it's my duty as his fan, to let y'all know, the best that I can, what a down to earth dude Jared Tristan Padalecki truly is.

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JARED PADALECKI SUPANOVA CONVENTION SYDNEY Part II

Jun. 22nd, 2008 | 12:25 pm




 

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